My thyroid is a matter of opinion

Today was another 'health tourism day'.

We started it by forcing ourselves to drink over a litre of water. The catch: no allowed to pee it out.

The reason: Ultrasounds...

As part of the full healthcare tourism of a third world country package, we were given the all inclusive benefit of being forced into every medical check imaginable.

In my last article I talked in depth about going to the dentist and the quality of dentists in the UK. This time I will talk not about the UK, because I have never had the experience of getting an ultrasound on the NHS.

To start, we did not check because there is something immediately wrong with us. (I say immediately because it will be an important word to remember for later).

The building was a Поліклініка (Poly-clinic-a). Just like poly-amerous it means there is lots of questionable people in the building. We went early before official opening times, as it is common for doctors to take cash payments before official hours for those who want to neurotically test themselves every year.

It felt very anime-desu, because it was like an old school or soviet hospital. The neat part is it is literally a hospital built in the soviet times.

The scan itself

So we wait around bursting for a pee, and enter old guy dressed like a doctor you would legit see in Chornobyl (HBO TV series). Invites us in and gets started with Alisa rubbing weird goo all over her and checking her. I stood ready to stop him and demonstrate she is my wife...

Everything was fine with her, and I even got to see her fucked up galbladder she is always telling me about.

Then it came to my turn - I did not know what I was in for and apparently neither did the doctor. He put his hand on my shoulder and said "і девoчка?" which means "and the/this girl?". If mother in law had not intervened he would've spent a long time looking for my ovaries on the ultrasound.

However, he did find something interesting - macrocalcifications on my thyroid! Whatever that means.

Yeah so probably going to have an ultrasound again in 6 months. Probably benign but anything more than a 1% odd is a bit scary.

Blood tests!

More health tourism! Gosh, leftist westoids will hate me...

Just the regular, also to monitor my hormone levels (iykyk). After blood tests we felt a bit faint so obviously we headed to Silpo to buy some Rollini.

Today it has been incredibly hot. Like 30c, humid, terrible.

Eye tests

We chilled at home for a second, then we had another appointment!

Seriously - is this blog 'are you alive' because I am testing every component of my body like a kernel initialization? haha I am quirky technology femoid i love linux !!

The clinic we go to is a family friend, where grandma in law used to work. She helped us get appointments and chase up the clinic to make sure we got our lenses on time, the last time we visited.

This time we were met with a completely refurbished interior with new machines. The ones they had before were straight out of the early 2000s, complete with balloon and a light which feels like it punches you.

Now they were like automatically moving and capturing the information to judge your minus. I'm the same as before, -0.75.

You'd think that's really minor, but man when I got glasses for the first time anything further than a metre away felt like it was blurry as hell. It also made me realised just how dangerous driving was with that low of a number. Then I realised there will 100% be old fucks with worse vision driving because they haven't needed a vision test yet.

No wonder they do 40 in a 60.

After that we went home, a pure chilling day...

Nevermind, anime...

I genuinely forgot we went Pulsar, the oldest and best anime shop in Kyiv (maybe Ukraine? who knows).

I only remembered when looking at my pictures from each of the days, because when I type up my notes apparently I just forget to type half the day in. I am also typing this in after I wrote the post scriptum bit which comes next, so the comment about making up for word count from earlier might not be true by the time we get to the end but maybe you can tell through my lack of proper sentence structure and the fact this sentence feels like it is never going to end that I am currently padding the word count so that I feel more accomplished like my blog is worth reading by anyone but at the same time it feels good to type and distract myself while Putin brings out his big Oreshnik.

The only thing unimpressive in Pulsar is the prices. I understand it is probably due to import fees though, and the fact the market for anime stuff in Ukraine is probably a lot smaller than western countries, as anime was seen as something to bully someone about. It still was in the UK, but I feel like Ukraine socially and culturally is a few years behind the UK when it comes to the social progressiveness of not bullying people over cartoons.

Though people should be bullied for some cartoons they watch, and you can leave that to your own interpretation.

Hint: it's about No Game No Life fans

They had so many Frierens. I then turned to Alice and we agreed on a pact that when we get a new figure shelf next month, we must christen it with a new figure from each of us. This was an easy way to convince Alice to let me purchase more figures (she does not need convincing).

Katawa Shoujo is genuinely a favourite piece of modern art of mine. Like I know it's fucked up and it's one of those things where it is "deep" but also an excuse for teenagers to write a visual novel on 4chan about disabled girls. But man, it was a great experience when I was 17 to read through it, and god damn that soundtrack.

Anyway, we walked away with our bag of shame, hidden in KFC.

Honestly, it feels like I am spamming pictures, but it is hard to get across some of the topics or themes without them. For example:

How am I supposed to explain all our silly pins, inclusive of yuri, gachi quotes, a dead meme from years ago (not dead in my heart, Ricardo), and a bunch of Ukrainian translated manga, as well as a Japan-released Ukrainian manga about a soldier saving a cat?

Come on, literally how do I even describe any of that.

Also, pay attention to the green yuri, it will come up next time. and it will be marked on the test.

Damn, two pictures at once. Overwhelming. Humiliating your senses. What am I going to do next? And no, I have no clue how to resize them. I am sorry.

Post scriptum

A real short one today. Partly because I have been running behind a bit with these blogs, but partly because things just aren't as interesting when you are doing appointments for health stuff with nothing cool to talk about. Yes I could describe at length, in a verbose manner, exactly what we did... but that isn't as fun as writing commentary or trying to make things sound reddit tier funny, right?

Stay tuned for another short day. I think. It was mostly chilling.